He stared at his shivering hands. Finally he had killed the SOB. A clean kill. He fixed himself a stiff scotch and took a gulp. In his world people are known by the number of kills achieved. He’d soon have an established business now.
“Acme Stray Dog Exterminator Services”
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
He woke up in a hospital bed. Alive. He couldn't believe it. He was not dead after all. He could remember returning from practice and a bike coming from the wrong side. Relieved that he could still run the marathon, his dream, he tried getting up but froze. He couldn't feel his legs.
PS: This one just struck me outta the blue while I was studying economics. As per instructions from @Sorcerer I just saved it in my cell, but couldn't wait to post it. So this is like my mostest fastest post from the conceptualizing -----> publishing point of view. Why am I typing this rubbish? Coz I don wanna go back to study economics!
I just realized that blogging aint gonna help me score marks in my exam which starts TOMORROW! So I better get back to study. Thanks to all the people who'll comment wishing me luck for the exams... I guess I'll be outta blogsville for a while but I'll surely be reading your stuff through Google Reader...
OMG I can't think of anything else to write... It means they'll be taking me back! My time is over! ECONOMICS........ Here I come!
*Quickly rechecks the word count just in case some of the #blog_vultures are prying!
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Heya Ppl. Long time since my last post. Just been busy with my college programs and class tests. Going through *THAT* phase of my life. Yeah... The exam preparation one!
Anyways here is an incident I wanna share with you guys. In 2009 I'd appeared for an exam held by Bank of India for Clerical Post.
- All the people who rolled their eyes at '2009', chillax. Its not that I'm blogging too late about this thing, I just had a ummmm an oath let say. We'll come to that later.
- All the people who rolled their eyes at 'Bank', chillax. I don't plan to stay in the banking business all my life.I just had to show the people around me that I was not totally useless (I can be used as a bad example!)
- All the people who rolled their eyes at 'Clerical', chillax. What did you expect? You can't become a branch manager directly by giving exams! Steps of the ladder you see...
Back to the topic... So after giving this exam I'd totally forgotten about it and din even remember to check the result. One fine lucky day I got this letter from the Bank saying that I've been selected for the Interview round and I was like W00t? Really? This must be easy that! Being Happy happy, I went about telling people that I've been selected for the interview to which most of them replied in the sarcastic tone ever "Clerical hi hai na?.... Then thik hai" Idiots! half of them have been bluddy unemployed for most of their lives!
Then came to interview thingie which I was quite confident about. The panel was great. They were interested in my blogging too. They even asked me whether I will blog about my interview experience to which I promptly replied in the positive, hoping they'd at least gimme the job trying to get featured on my AweSome blog!
*I see the '2009' people rolling their eyes again. I said I'l come back to it.
Anyways again coming back to the topic. I finished my interview and came back home like a cow comes back to the shed in the evening. Soon after the interview thing was long forgotten.
Just a week back I happened to check the website of the Bank and was I surprised to see my name amongst the selected candidates. It was a gr8 surprise for me and the family. Our family has so many bankers, that if we owned a bank, we'd not need other employees at all!
So everything settled, I decided to inform all my friends and family (especially the jobless losers who are jobless most of the time and losers the remaining time)
So typed a msg and sent it to my sis
"Hey wudup? Guess what... I cleared the bank thing"
After a few minutes she replied
"Hey thats so great! You cleared the audition too?"
me: (thinking Audition = Interview): Yes of course. The panel was sweet!
She: Oh this is so great! I gotta tell all my friends, my bro is such a Rockstar!"
Me: (wondering with a big aaaaaaiiiiiiinnnnnnngggggg? Whats with her? Is this the first time someone is getting a govt job in this company/) Ya Ya... Sure Sure.
She: So when is your gig? Wherez you playing next?
Me: (Bigger AAAAAIIIIIIINNNNNNGGGGGGG?) What you talking about? You talking to me na?
She: Whenz you're band gonna play? and where? I want passes haaaaaa.... For all my friends.
Me: Band? What Band? I got a job in a BANK! The only band there is the rubber band to keep the notes together!
She: Thats what you told me! Dumbo! Next time watch what you send...
It was then that I check my outbox. While sending the first msg, I committed a typo that ruined my day. Wrote BAND instead of BANK. Due to which my sis thought I had participated in so band contest and had cleared it. I picked up the cell again.
Me: Oops sorry. My bad! But thanks for ruining it for me. Now everytime I tell anyone, I get reminded that it'd been lot more cooler if I'd given a band audition!
She: Oh Buzz off! Imagine what I'l go through when my 'free pass" friends will come to know that my bro is in a bank and not a band! And BTW, get me something decent from your first salary.
Typos are becoming a part of life these days. especially when you're using predictive text on your phone.
I sent a similar msg to a friend who is a little too smart and just loves to look me down.
"Dude I got selected"
He replied with "Oh man that's so sad. But its OK dude. Everyone can't pass that thing"
After checking I found that "selected" and "rejected" are written with the same set of keys on the phone.
To this date he is not ready to accept that I have passed!
- Archana (the bling bling diamond gal): for kicking my laziness out and making me write this.
- The Bank of India Interview Panel: It will be a pleasure working with you guys. I had promised you, I'l write about you, and here it is! Keep up the good work Sirs.
- The BSNL Guys: After about 2 hours of mindless non sense DCs, finally there is connectivity when I need to post! (I almost debited you)
Now me being a banker, can't credit everything. Have to debit stuff to keep the balance!
- The loojers who think they'll be given jobs at higher posts directly.
- The smartie in whose face I'l have to slam my appointment letter so that he finally believes that I made it!
PS: Oops... Almost forgot about the oath. Well this post had struck me a long time back. And I was planning to post it during the interview period. But I was apprehensive of the fact that people would ask me finally about my result. So I decided to publish this post only after the result and only if I passed coz it would suck to tell every other commentator that I failed.